Humorous Sayings

I had a heart attack earlier this year... the ambulance took me to PC world for repairs.

People think I'm really smart. But when people ask me a question I type in the answer on my little computer screen. How do you know I am not just googling that shit before I answer?

Some people say I have a chip on my shoulder but it is actually my chin.

I felt ill the other day, but all they had to do was to turn me off, and then back on again.

So my friend tried to call me the other week... but all he was getting was an automated answer.

I tell my kids: Don't spend all your time at the computer. But then I realize, I do that myself all day.

Economics is for donkeys.

Yes, we are reactionaries, and you are enlightened intellectuals: You intellectuals do not want us to go back 1400 years.

There is no fun in Islam. There can be no fun and joy in whatever is serious.

Allah did not create man so that he could have fun. The aim of creation was for mankind to be put to the test through hardship and prayer. An Islamic regime must be serious in every field. There are no jokes in Islam. There is no humor in Islam. Ther…

I am willing to kill for my people, so I should not be able to lie and cheat for them?

My hero is Abraham Lincoln.

The Palestinian people have no national identity. I, Yasser Arafat, man of destiny, will give them that identity through conflict with Israel.

By God, I have not found it invincible... I wish all my nation was with me to see the feebleness of this army.

No matter if it is a white cat or a black cat; as long as it can catch mice, it is a good cat.

Keep a cool head and maintain a low profile. Never take the lead – but aim to do something big.

Poverty is not socialism.

I am optimistic. It doesn't matter if the sky is falling, I am a little man, and you big men are against the sky.

Has the US Congress passed a law banning smoking during the talks?

We could send you 10 million immigrants right away.