Humorous Sayings
939 sayings found from the Ancient era
Above ground, I'll be eaten by the crows and kites; below ground, I'll be eaten by the ants and molecrickets. You rob the one of them to give to the other; how come you like them so much better?
I have heaven and earth for my outer and inner coffin, the sun and moon for my pair of jade discs, the stars for my pearls, the myriad creatures for my farewell presents. Is anything missing from my funeral paraphernalia? What will you add to these?
A monkey trainer tells his monkeys that he will give them three nuts in the morning and four in the evening. The monkeys are outraged. So the trainer changes course. He offers the monkeys four in the morning and three in the evening. Now the monkeys …
Running around accusing others is not as good as laughing. And enjoying a good laugh is not as good as going along with things.
The unity and my saying it make two. The two and their unity make three. Starting from here, even a clever mathematician couldn't get it, much less an ordinary person! If going from nothing to something you get three, what about going from something …
But among the blessed immortals uncontrollable laughter went up as they saw Hephaestos bustling about the palace.
Hera, do not hope to know all my thoughts; they will be hard for you, although you are my wife.
You blabbermouth, Thersites! You are quite marvelous at public speaking. But now shut up!
Nobody -- that's my name. Nobody -- so my mother and father call me, all my friends.
He (Hector) does not summon you to come to dance, but to do battle.
A wicked crew betrayed me—they and a cruel sleep.
And empty words are evil.
I want to tell you something but good taste. Restrains me.
No honey for me, if it comes with a bee.
I can't stand being the old one any longer, Living with you.
I would not think to touch the sky with two arms.
The gorgeous man presents a gorgeous view; The good man will in time be gorgeous, too.
When anger spreads through the breath, guard thy tongue from barking idly.
Love is a cunning weaver of fantasies and fables.
Sweet mother, I truly cannot weave my web; for I am o'erwhelmed through Aphrodite with love of a slender youth.