"I'm not a politician. I'm a comedian. I'm here to make you laugh, not vote."

"I'm not smoking crack. I'm definitely stressed out."

"“I'm not going to let anyone tell me what I can and cannot say.”"

"Is this the 5:00 Free Crack Giveaway?"

"If you’re a white person in America and you haven’t been called a racist, you’re not trying hard enough."