"I am a democrat only on principle, not by instinct, nobody is that. Doubtless some people say they are, but this world is grievously given to lying."

"I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting."

"Adam was the only man who, when he said a good thing, knew that nobody had said it before him."

"I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a hell of a time in heaven."

"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."