"When asked, 'How do you write?' I invariably answer, 'One word at a time,' and the answer is always true."

"You can, you should, and if you're brave enough to start, you will."

"What's the difference between Trump's cabinet and a cactus? With a cactus, all the pricks are on the outside. Thank you, I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waitress."

"The greatest ideas are the simplest."

"When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just s…"