"Being a celebrity is like being a character actor in a movie that's always on."

"You don't know about real loss 'cause it's only when you love something more than you love yourself that you can know it."

"You got to be crazy to be in this business."

"Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."

"I just want to make people happy. That's my job."