"My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it."

"The ass is the only animal that can't be improved by cross-breeding."

"If you don't read a newspaper, you are uninformed. If you do read it, you are misinformed."

"I am an American, and I like to see a man do what he says he will do."

"Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get."