"“If I'm a dirty comic, it's because I'm talking about dirty things that exist in the world.”"

"Every day, people are dying. They're not dying because they're old, they're not dying because they're sick, they're dying because they're bored."

"“Every day people are being brainwashed into believing that they're supposed to be something that they're not.”"

"The only way to get laid is to get laid to rest."

"The word 'nigger' is not a bad word. Bad people make it a bad word."