"When you're interested in somebody, and you think they might be interested in you, you should point out all your beauty problems and defects right away, rather than take a chance they won't notice the…"

"I'm not a real werewolf. I'm a commercial werewolf."

"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."

"They always say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."

"I just do art because I'm ugly and there's nothing else for me to do."